AAADD 

As heard on the Good Stuff with Jim Thompson

 

Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.  Somehow I feel better even though I have it!! 

 

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -  Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. 

 

This is how it manifests: 

 

I decide to water my garden.  As I turn on the hose in the driveway, 

I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. 

 

As I start toward the garage,  I notice mail on the porch table that 

I brought up from the mail box earlier. 

 

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. 

 

I lay my car keys on the table,  put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,  and notice that the can is full. 

 

So, I decide to put the bills back  on the table and  take out the garbage first. 

 

But then I think,  since I'm going to be near the mailbox 

when I take out the garbage anyway,  I may as well pay the bills first. 

 

I take my check book off the table,  and see that there is only one check left. 

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,  so I go inside the house to my desk where  I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking. 

 

I'm going to look for my checks,  but first I need to push the Pepsi aside 

so that I don't accidentally knock it over. 

 

The Pepsi is getting warm,  and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. 

 

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,  a vase of flowers on the counter  catches my eye--they need water. 

 

I put the Pepsi on the counter and  discover my reading  glasses that 

I've been searching for all morning.  I decide I better put them back on my desk,  but first I'm going to water the flowers. 

 

I set the glasses back down on the counter,  fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.  Someone left it on the kitchen table. 

 

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,  I'll be looking for the remote,  but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, 

so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, 

but first I'll water the flowers. 

 

I pour some water in the flowers,  but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. 

 

So, I set the remote back on the table,  get some towels and wipe up the spill. 

 

Then, I head down the hall trying to  remember what I was planning to do. 

 

At the end of  the day: 

the car isn't washed 

the bills aren't paid 

there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter 

the flowers don't have enough water, 

there is still only 1 check in my check book, 

I can't find the remote, 

I can't find my glasses, 

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. 

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, 

I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, 

and I'm really tired. 

 

I realize this is a serious problem, 

and I'll try to get some help for it, 

but first I'll check my e-mail..... 

 

 

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is  coming!!