If there's a sin tax on my ding dong

and my ho hos become no nos

and I can't deep fry my taters

cause there's transfat in them Jo Jos

If my Lucky Charms get banned

and I'm stuck with shredded wheat

cause some guy in charge in Washington

thinks I need to see my feet,

If the mad cow takes my burger down

adn the bees leave me with no honey

and the crops don't get pollinated this year

cause my cell phone made them funny,

If the corn gets all used for Ethanol

and they quit making my Dorritos

and MSG gets outlawed in the states

there go Chinese food and Cheetos,

well then my life is pretty much over

abnd this country I used to love will stink

so I'm beggin' us all, let's stop this mess

before the fat man becomes extinct