"I don't know how it happened boys.
The man I used to be
is somehow  not the same a-tall,"
lamented Ol' J.C.

The crew now gathered 'round again
to listen and reflect
on how a man just out of prime
was now a total wreck.

They'd heard the tale a hundred times,
but never once complained,
cause ever time he told it seemed
the ailments weren't the same.

"For fifty years, no, fifty-nine,"
the elder cowboy sighed.
"I never had a need not once
to have a pill prescribed."

"Yet here I am seems all at once
them doctors all agree,
I got so many pills to take
I'm like a pharmacy."

The crew now sort of settled in
a nudge and then a wink,
as Ol' J.C. prepared to tell
how fast a man could sink.

"My eyes are weak, my hearin' bad,
my knees just sorta catch.
For ever ache and pain I got
I got a pill to match."

"They tell me that my plumbin's bad,
and lookin' at my gall,
If they could have their druthers son,
they'd flat remove it all."

"My pressure's up, my height is down,
my sugar took a spike.
I'm free to eat whatever, boys,
except the things I like."

"My hair is thin, I've brittle skin;
my teeth aren't all that sound.
I'm out of shape and overweight
they tell me fifty pounds."

"They've run so many tests on me
from head to toe and back,
them specialists are lining up,
and each one wants a crack."

"Could be I got arthritic joints.
Just walkin' causes pain.
My back is out and bones are stiff
'bout ever time it rains.

Just then Ol' Cookie gave a yell,
"Alright the chow is on."
Ol'  J.C. got a running start,
and like the wind was gone.

He beat the crew by forty feet
to be the first in line.
"Don't seem that ill to me," said Slim,
"the way he ran to dine."

"Why don't you see," a hand cut in,
"Ol' J.C. needs his strength.
It takes a lot of energy
just livin' on the brink."